the perfect misfit piece.

i don't like that title. i may not like any of these words, but i'm going to get them out so i don't lose the scent of tonight's stars before i fall asleep, you know, cigarettes always smell better on people you love, i'm trying so desperately to keep my fingers moving fingers typing heart pumping words moving because tonights stars smell like more than cigarettes no they smell like laughter and bitterness you let go of to submit stuff you put everything you had into because you secretly believe you are worth it i write this for all of you. because i know he always gets poems written about him because its easy and its fun and you just wanted to be a writer, he just wanted to be a winner and the third he just wanted to be the favorite he is the favorite. but i write this for each and every one of you because you are beautiful. because you are right, we live up to the best because we were never birthed into expectancy if it were not for you- all of you- i would not spell star scents with my fingertips i would not write thanks in bottled jars to ship out to the sea for someone down last year's ocean road to find they're inspiring, you say. they're brilliant, you say, genius, you say i can smell self-loathing on you like you tried to wash off cheap cologne he pulls you back. says remember, the work is already done: fuck it, i've already lost. and then we remember. we all remember, we've already lost and THAT'S THE BEAUTY OF IT! that is the WONDER of it, you know, it took long enough for me to get it through my head i have it through my head i know it through my heart this is long but i have so much to say and so little time before i stop.

i have it

through

my

head.

that winning means nothing. that fame means nothing. that all this ever IS all this ever WILL be if i want it to BE SOMETHING is

honest

STARLIGHT, STARBRIGHT
WISH I MAY
WISH I MIGHT
HAVE THIS WISH I WISH TONIGHT
cigarette star, sober love, worlds poet, school teacher, coffee drinker, pipe smoker, melody poet, rhymeless weaver some names i do not know some of these names i know too well and forgive me if i sound too much like anis but this is for you because i want you to remember me remembering that what matters, matters, and what doesn't, DAMN WELL DOESN'T,

I WANT THE STARS TO KNOW I SING YOU- EVERY ONE OF YOU WHO'S EVER BREAHTED OR WHO HASN'T OR WHO MIGHT OR WHO IS AFRAID TO- I SING YOU TO THE STARS BECAUSE WITHOUT YOU

i would not live.




i still don't like that title.
but my fingertips are empty.
and i promise you and myself,
i will not change one piece of these words
ever.
i will not go back and regret what i might have misspelled or missaid because i spelled it and i said it and now it is done i will remember.